Fail.

Missed my weekly goal of 50 miles this week, by about 20 miles.  Overall it was a pretty crappy cycling week.  I took a deserved rest day on Monday, blew off cycling on Tuesday because of the earthquake, and had that craptastic ride Wednesday.  Then on Thursday the group ride was cancelled AGAIN because of storms, so I ran some pre-hurricane errands and made it home too late to ride.  Friday I only fit in 4 miles on the rollers before company came over (that's one thing to be proud of -- I'm SO much more comfortable on the rollers, although I still sorta fear for my life on them).  Saturday morning we overslept and only had an hour to ride, we opted for a quick warm-up on Beach and then tackling the repeats hill again.  By all accounts I should be stronger now, I've gotten a few tough rides in since the first time we did the hill, which had been right after we took almost all of July off.  For whatever reason though, it was just a crappy ride again.  1st time up was painful, 2nd time was a mess, I was about to call it quits but decided I knew how to get up the damn hill and I had to give it one more try. 

3rd time up, I did a standing climb on the steep section just before it levels out halfway through -- and I got so dizzy I had to stop.   Or, to be honest, I think I got a little dizzy but so fatigued and frustrated that I let my mind convince me I couldn't do it.  I take back what I said about being a good climber.  Sometimes I can take the pain (I am my father's daughter), but I'm also prone to self-doubt and sometimes my head just gets in my way.  Anyway, after a breather I did ride to the top, and then dramatically fell over.  This ride was just before Hurricane Irene came through, and barometric pressure was dropping, which may have had something to do with my lack of stamina.  I don't know.  Maybe it was last week being my highest mileage week yet, with that one tough 40 miler, although you'd think I'd be over that within a few days.  Anyway, Sunday the winds were still high, so I just did the trainer and of course that was a crappy ride, the trainer always is.  I was also an idiot about the workout in general, since I wasn't sure what was going on with my body and if I needed a recovery ride or not, since I hadn't done much of anything -- so I started out too hard, spent most of it too easy, and then threw in a few high intensity intervals just to ensure it was the least focused trainer session of all time. 

I'm trying to cut myself a little slack, since we DID have two natural disasters in one week, and I made it on the bike 4 times -- I just wasn't feeling it, ever.  Tonight is probably the only night I'll be able to ride prior to a long weekend at the beach, but instead of trying to get lots of miles in we're just going to bike to a cheap dinner.  I need a fun ride.  Hopefully Mr. Lady Roadie and my dad will let me come along on one of their rides (they're training for a century just a couple weeks away now, so I don't want to slow them down too much) so I don't blow my weekly goal again.  I am going to let myself relax at the beach though, and not put too much emphasis on mileage this week if I'm not feeling it -- it's been a long summer and I'm ready for a little vacation.